Dear Southern California Drivers,

Please learn to drive.

This seems like a simple task, but some of you are having trouble. For example, if I am in Lane 1 driving slightly over the speed limit, and you are ahead of me in Lane 2 driving slower than I am, there is no reason for you to switch lanes in front of me and cause me to slow down. If you desperately need to get into my lane, perhaps you could wait until I pass you, and THEN move over. A novel concept, I know! It might cost you a few extra precious seconds of being in your lane, but I promise you’ll get to move over very soon.

Additionally, I know many of you enjoy multitasking while driving. I don’t judge you for that. I do the same thing. However, if you are multitasking, you should continue driving the speed of traffic. If you cannot do that, you should immediately cease whatever extracurricular activities you are engaged in and DRIVE! This will get you to your destination faster, and will keep me from screaming expletive laden Offspring lyrics at you as I drive past.

I’m sure I have other helpful suggestions for you, but as I have spent all my energy screaming at the idiots I encountered on the way home, I can no longer think clearly.

Have a lovely day!

Denora